There has been a new addition to the family....No it's not the patter of more tiny feet but rather the patter of tiny paws.  Martin got me a little doggy for my Birthday  I grew up with dogs and have wanted one of my own for years but we wanted to wait untill the children were a little older before we made the desicion to get one.

His name is Buster, He is only a year old and very playful. He's very much like a Border Collie and is just so cute. The children have all been up in the clouds since his arrival on Sunday and are having so much fun playing with him. They will no doubt be fed up with him within a week so he better make the most of it.   We are all enjoying having him around though and it will make the chore of walking to school a little more exciting.

Apart from Buster making his debut, Sunday was a nice quiet family day. The kids all made me cards for my Birthday, drew lots of pictures, done the little jobs around the house and behaved like little angels. That doesn't happen very often so it was much appriciated.  I got a lovely new plant for my living room, some even lovelier choccys, new books and DVD'S and some new clothes so i had a great day. I was a little upset that no-one from the site i have supported for years mentioned my Birthday but i guess i can't have it all huh!!!! I'm sure they have their reasons for forgetting about me.

Louise was back to school yesterday but the rest are home untill Thursday when the new school opens. Louise goes away tomorrow for her residental course so it will feel strange for the next few days not having her around. She is looking forward to going away though and i hope it gives her a little boost. We will have to get her bag sorted tonight so she is all set in the morning.

Again this is a really short entry but at least i am getting here.

Love and peace to all,

Michelle

I'll let you into a little secret....You won't tell anyone will you ? OK....Tomorrow is my Birthday and i will reach the grand old age of 21....OK,OK, so it's really 31 but we can keep that just between the two of us right ?  For me Birthdays bring a mixture of emotions. One one hand it's a celebration of the day i was born and one the other, the memories of a rape that devestated my whole life haunt me. While i try and keep the past in the past it can be difficult sometimes. As the years pass and i get older the not so nice memories of my Birthday are being pushed into the background and new happy memories are being created.

The past few days have been spent cleaning up the house and keeping the kids amused. They have mostly been playing outside so that makes my job a little easier. I don't intend to do any housework tomorrow so getting everything done today is a top priority. The kids usually help out around the house on my Birthday so i can have a day of rest.  I expect i will be spending early afternoon cheering on Hearts as they take on Celtic in the Scottish Cup semi Final. Hearts had a remarkable and unexpected win against Celtic last weekend so i will be praying they can do the same again, but something tells me Celtic will be out for a little revenge.

Today i watched the Royal Wedding on TV. For the past week the news has been dominated by the sad passing and funeral of Pope John Paul II so it was nice to see something more pleasent. Although i must say not all the British public are happy about the wedding of Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles, now the Duchess of Cornwall. Personally i think they should be allowed to do whatever they wish.

Today was also Grand National day. I usually have a little bet on the race but not this year. Hedgehunter was the eventual winner and i am a little annoyed  because that was my choise of horse. I backed him last year, when he fell at the last fence, so he was the obvious choise for me this year. In hindsight i wish i had put a few bob on him.  But never mind, i got something better than money for him winning, a kiss from Caitlin. We agreed that if any of the horses we picked won, the winner would get a kiss.

This is just a short and sweet entry today but i hope you are having a great weekend.

Love and peace,

Michelle  

Well it's been an eventful few weeks which is why i have been unable to get here. We decided to head up to Inverness on Good Friday to visit my parents. It was a nice day so being stuck in the car for hours wasn't much fun.

On the Saturday we took our kids and my niece out for the day. First we went to Culloden Moor, scene of the historic Battle of Culloden. Suzanne is doing a school project on Bonnie Prince Charlie and the Jacobites at the moment so it was great for her to visit the place. We took some photos of her on the battlefield and next to the monument. We were also lucky enough to have people dressed up in the clothes of the time so she had her photo taken with them aswel.  I have put a photo of the memorial monument on the website if you'd like to take a look.(It's in the experiences section under Scotland Photos)

We then took a drive to Loch Ness, home of the one and only Nessie. It was quite a cold drizzly day so we didn't spot Nessie in the vast Loch this time  I did get a nice photos of Urquhart Catle though which is on the website.

We took the kids out on a boat which is in a lovely little park. I took Louise and Paul in my boat and Martin had Suzanne, Caitlin and Jade in his. I have to say rowing that boat is not as easy as it looks. Normally we would all go in one boat and Martin would do the rowing but unfortunately this time there were too many of us. It was a lot of fun but i don't expect i will win Olympic Gold in rowing.  After the boat ride the kids played in the park and had ice-cream before heading back to my parents house.

Easter Sunday we had a big family meal with my parents, my sister and my two nieces. The kids got their Easter eggs and wanted to eat all of them in one go. My sister took all the kids to the cinema in the afternoon while the rest of us started the preperation for tea.

We headed back home to Edinburgh on Monday. We took the scenic route home so it was a long drive. The scenery was well worth it though. Loads of mountains, Lochs and forests.

On Tuesday we took the kids to the museum. They have a dinsaurs alive exhibition at the moment and with Paul loving his dinosaurs we just had to take him.  Everyone had a really good time and the little ones liked all the life size moving model dino's they had. The T-Rex was a particular favorite.

The rest of the week the kids have been outside playing on their bikes. The sun has been shining upon us so i figured we better make the most of it. Yesterday the kids and I took a walk through a park near our house. It is a beutiful park with a river running through the middle of it. My mum used to go there when she was a kid and so did i so i am keeping up the family tradition.

My urges have been kind to me during our little holiday which has helped tremendously. They are still very low and i am praying they will stay that way.  My hair is driving me bananas though. It is so flat and lifeless at the moment and i can do nothing with it at all. I have also had a lot of headaches lately.  I don't really like taking anything for headaches but i have had to give in and get the painkillers out.

Well it's almost time for dinner so i better get my cooking hat on. I have no idea what i am going to make tonight but i'd better decide quickly before the little ones start complaining they are hungry.

Love and peace to all

Michelle xxxx

It's the beginning of the Easter Holidays.  Suzanne, Paul and Caitlin have some extra days holiday so they are off today but Louse is at school. The reason the smaller ones have extra time off is to allow the teacher to pack up the classrooms for the move to the new school. Some of you may remember my entry about the fires the school has suffered over the past few years and the disruption it has casued for the children. Well the children finally have their new school built and move in after the Easter Holidays.

Yesterday i took the camera to school and took some photos of the kids outside the school. They have really loved their time at that school and it will be sad to see the building demolished, but i am sure the new building wil be just as nice for them. Hopefully this will be the start of more settled times for them because the last few years the older children have been moved around between old classrooms in the local high school and temp huts. Luckily the junior section of the school was left untouched by the fires so the smaller children have remainied in the main school. It will be nice to have all the children back in one building and we can once again be a normal school community.

The last two days have been beauitiful here. The sun is shinning upon us and the kids are getting out into the garden for some much needed fresh air and excercise.  It has been so cold for them lately that all they wanted to do was play in their rooms but yesterday and today they have been out on their scooters. I believe Caitlin is taking her dolly's for a stroll in their buggy today  It's also been great to get the clothes dried outside on the washing line. I have to do so much washing everyday and having the chance to get it outside to dry means the tumble dryer gets a well deserved break. It sure saves on the electricity too

Urges have been pure hell for about the last week. Well whats new huh!!!! I think with the better weather coming in now i will see a huge difference. Now only in my urges but in my general positivemess. Winter always puts such a strain on me and there always seems to be this dark cloud looming no matter what i do.  Brighter, warmer days bring me out of that loomimng darkness and into the real world.

The cross stitching project is going well. The wedding one is well on its way but i had to take a break from it so i could get Paul's dinosaur bookmark made. He has been driving me crazy asking for it.  It is almost finished but now Caitlin wants one too  I'll just change the colours round a little so it looks more girlie and make one for her then i will get back to the wedding one.

Another thing i have been doing a lot lately is drawing. I used to do it alot when i was at school, or at least i tried.  With a little patience and a lot of correction i could usually draw a half decent picture but i could never draw people, faces in particular. So i have been trying to perfect the art of drawing people. It's not going great but i am having fun trying.

Time is running away from me here and i still have so much to do in the house so i will bid you all goodbye for now.

If i don't get on here before Easter Sunday i hope you all have a great day. Don't eat too much chocolate guys

Love ans peace,

Michelle        

It's been a while since i used my creative mind to design a cross stitch patterns but i have gone into overdrive this week  My brother in Law is getting married in April so i though it would be a nice idea to make up a little cross stitch to mark the occasion. I think hand made gifts make the best prezzies and it also keeps my little hands busy. I originally started doing the cross stitching as a deterant to pulling but as i have been pull free for a while i don't need it to keep me occupied anymore. I do still enjoy doing it though. So i am gonna get to work on my wedding gift over the weekend as my thread order arrived today. I have already finished making a pattern for my mother in laws birthday prezzie and next i will work on one for my mom. That should keep me busy for a while  Paul has also asked me to make him a dinosaur bookmark....that shouldn't take me long to do so i will squeeze it in between my bigger projects.

I think i have finished re-designing the website logo. Not got round to uploading it to the site yet but again, i will squeeze it in somehow. Organising my time is not one of my strong points.

It has been a busy week for me because Paul and Caitlin have been poorly. They were both off school on Tuesday and Wednesday. I wasn't feeling too great myself those days so it was an exhausting few days. It has taken yesterday and today to recover from it.  I don't think anyone is feeling 100% today. Loads of runny noses and sore throats around. Hopefully the weekend will be a quiet one so we can all re-charge the batteries. The cross stitching will certainly help me relax and i will be encouraging the kids to use their creativity over the weekend aswell. Not that they will need much encouragement, they love craft activities.

I've had a terrible 2 days for urges. Mostly because i have felt a little run down i suspect, well that and the extra tea i have been drinking.  I plan to have an early night tonight so i can catch up on some sleep. I might even manage a nice hot bubble bath first. That always puts me in relaxation mode .

Well it's time to feed my lovely clan of children yet again

I wish you all a relaxing and peaceful weekend.

Love and peace,

Michelle      

It was Louise's parents evening at school yesterday evening. It was a long night for us all and we didn't get home untill 9.15pm. Of course the little ones were tired this morning as a result. I had to keep Caitlin home from nursery today because she was exhausted. She fell twice on the way to school and was covered in mud. I thought it best she stay home with mommy and get cleaned up and have a rest. She went for a sleep when we got home and she has been complaining of a sore tummy so it's just as well i kept her home.

Louise's parents evening went really well. We made a point of seeing the teachers of the subjects she is hoping to study for the next two years. Her English is fantastic, particularly her reading. She has always been into books in a big way and it shows in her test results. Maths she is coping well with although her teacher feels she has the potential to do better. Art she is brilliant at. The teacher highly recommended she continue with Art next year and said she has a real talent for the subject. Her science is great. At the moment they do a combined science class but she has been recommended for individual science next year. She has chosen Biology and Physics which did worry me a little. Two science subjects is a lot of work and i wanted to make sure her teacher felt she could cope with the heavy work load. He has no concerns about her ability to do well in both so my fears have been laid to rest and she can do both Biology and Phisics if she would like to. Drama is helping Lousie with her confidence which we have battled with for years. She does really well in Drama and continuing with it would benefit her as far as improving her confidence goes. Childcare she would do well at but she is undecided which subject to take between drams and childcare. History is another of her strong subjects. She shows good background knowledge and is keen to learn and express her opinions. The only real concern i have is the fact that most of the teachers picked up on Louise's lack of self confidence so we will work harder on that area.

It's been another cold day today. There is still snow around but it is slowly melting away, lets just hope there's no more on the way.  I've spent most of the day doing the washing and ironing so it's been pretty boring.  I did have Caitlin to keep me company though. I'm also working on a new logo for the website which is taking me longer than i had hoped because of all the computer problems. I will get in finished eventually but i have to do the mommy and wife things first.

Talking of mummy and wife things, i have dinner to get organised and it's not getting done with me sitting here. The cooker needs a little clean befire i can get started so i'd better get back to it.

Love and peace,

Michelle

Yesterday was my oldest babies Birthday, and yes you guessed it, she is now 13.  I can hardly believe i am the mother of a teenager, i just feel so old....lol...

Louise had a good Birthday though. She got some new clothes, which she was despereately in need of.... Some nice new perfume and bath oils.... A new school bag....Boots....Books....A work station for her bedroom....And mommy made her a Birthday cake with a little help from her younger sisters and brother. I really enjoy making the kids birthday cakes. We made Louise a mummy since she is an Ancient Egypt enthusiast. (that has nothing to do with me...lol...) Two of her Birthday books were on Ancient Egypt aswell so she was a very happy bunny. I might just borrow them off her if i get a chance. One is a history of Ancielnt Egypt and the other is to teach yourself how to read Hieroglyphs. We can both read a few of the symbols in the Ancient Texts but it would be great to be able to read them all.  Louise's passion for Egypt started when she was very young and she would now like to study archaeology specializing in Egyptology.

Today has been a nightmare.....We woke this morning to more snow which was quite unexpected. The roads this morning were total chaos as the snow took us a bit by surprise. Accidents all over the city caused many roads to be shut or had tailbacks for miles. Luckily the roads have cleared a little now. It has rained for much of the day so the snow is now just a slushy mess. It has been so cold and i really didn't want to go outside. I am in for the day now though so i can finally warm myself up and keep my poor little feet dry.

My head has been itching like crazy today. I have had to put my wooly hat on to go out and i certainly don't think that has helped matters. On the whole my urges are diminishing which is such a relief. They have been terribly hard to deal with for ages now. I think Louise's Birthday has improved my general feeling of well being despite making me feel old. I feel really proud that she is doing so well at school and growing into a such a nice young lady. I do still think of her as my little girl, and probably always will, but i also recognise that she is growing up. She looked like a mini adult with her new clothes on yesterday rather than the little girl i would like her to be....lol....

Well this older, and wiser, lady has hungry children to feed....Till next time

Take care of yourselves

Love and peace,

Michelle

I've had a really good week  Been busy as usual but i did manage to fit some fun and laughter into the week

TUESDAY - Edinburgh residents recieved the results of the transport referendum. The city council proposed to bring road tolls to the Capital, much the same as the ones in operation in London, and the people of Edinburgh had the chance to vote yes or no the the councils proposal. Two thirds of those who voted said no to the councils plans so Edinburgh will not introduce road tolls next year.

We had a good deal of snow overnight so woke up to a beautiful white city. It was the first day back to school for the kids but they wanted to stay home and play. I wasn't having any of it though and sent them all to school  We all had fun walking through the deep snow to school but i was soaking wet by the time i got home. After school i took them all along to the end of our street where we have a big field that the kids play on. We had snowball fights, slid down the hill on the sledge and made snow angels. It was such good fun. Again we were all soaked when we came home so the warm house, hot chocolate and clean dry pjamas were very much welcomed by us all.

WEDNESDAY - More snow overnight so it was another wet walk to school and another evening playing in the snow. The kids built a snowman in the front garden after an hour of snowball fighting and sledging.

I spent most of the day in Louise's room. It is her birthday on Monday and we are getting her a new workstation for her room. I had to move her bed and wardrobe around a little but i am happy with the way it is now.

Louise got her school report and options sheet from school. Her report was great, as always, with almost all the teachers recommending her to take their course next year. Her choises so far are to take standard/credit grade Maths, English, French, Biology, History, Art and Design and drama. She has one more block to choose from but she is having a hard job finding one she would like to do, poor thing. I have advised her to speak to guidance staff at school about her little problem so they are going to speak to her on Monday. I really feel she is to young to be taking her options now, she is only 12 (untill monday) but most of the other 2nd year students are turning 14 this year. The reason for the age gap is that Louise is a leap year baby. The entry date for school happened to fall on her birthday so Martin and i were given the option to send Loiuse to school or keep her at nursery for her second year. We were advised to send her to school because she was more than capable of doing the work. She is still more than capable of doing the work and is in the top group for most of her classes but i can't shake this feeling that i have pushed her into all these hard desicions when i could have kept her at nursery lke all the other kids. I guess thats just my protective mother streak coming through

THURSDAY - There was still a covering of snow on the ground but no new snowfall today. It did rain which meant a lot of slushy mess on the roads.

I moved the furniture around in Suzanne and Caitlin's bedroom so we could get some shelving on the walls to accomodate the ever increasing collection of books they have. The birthday prezzies i ordered for Louise arrived and i was so relieved they got here on time. It was a quiet evening in front of the TV which was much needed after the cold nights in the snow.

FRIDAY - After dropping the kids off at school i went into town to get the last of Louise's birthday things. The kids are all home at lunch time on Fridays so they tidied the bedrooms while i recovered from the shopping trip. Man! I hate shopping.  

It was another quiet night of colouring in with the little ones, playing games and watching TV. I discused Louise's options with her a little more. We went through all the course material for the subjects she has already chosen and went through the choises in the block she is struggling with. I think she has it narrowed down to Physics and Italian but that could all change by tomorrow

Which brings us to today....I have spent the day cleaning up, trying to think of what to do for Louise's birthday cake and doing the usual mommy things....Martin has been working and is now getting a friend to have another look at the PC with a mind of it's own. He thinks the problem may finally have been figured out but i will wait untill he comes home with a woring PC before i get excited about it.  We have thought we had it fixed before and been dissapointed so i don't want to get my hopes up. My fingers are well and truly crossed though.

For the rest of the evening i am going to relax and read my book. I have to get the kids off to bed first but that shouldn't take long. They have been using up their energy all day and should be worn out by now. Then again, my kids never seem to run out of energy

I will bid you all a good night/day and wish you a fantastic weekend.

Love and peace,

Michelle

Yay! It's the final day of the school holidays  all the kiddies go back to school bright and early tomorrow.

It has been nice having them around the place. The house always seems so full of life when their little voices can be heard giggling and laughing, oh and the occasional temper tamtrum aswell  It's not been great weather while they have been at home, but then we rarely get really good weather. They have spent most of the time playing in their rooms. The last few days they have been outside playing with some new kids that moved into our street but snow paid us a little visit overnight and that has kept them in today. They did go out for a while this afternoon and threw snowballs at eack other, but they soon tired of that and were too cold to stay out. Paul wants some of mummy's home made soup to warm him up so we all went to the shops to get the supplies. The soup is now happily bubbling away on the stove and the smell is making me very hungry.

Over the last few days i have done a lot of clearing out around the house. I finally got stuck into my bedroom and got rid of a lot of stuff thats just cluttering the place up. I've sorted out a huge cupboard in the upstairs hall where all martins tools and boxes of screws are being kept. I have made a start on the boxes of clothes that are stored in the loft but i imagine that will take me another few days yet. All my baby clothes are up there and having 4 babies that have grown out of them all it adds up to a fair few boxes.  I am going to take the clothes to some charity shops so others can get some use out of them.

Urge wise, things are still not good.  This is the longest period for a long time that my urges have remained high. I have been careful with my food and skin care products in an effort to reduce them but nothing seems to be working. I've been getting plenty of sleep and I don't feel overly stressed or depressed so i am all out of ideas as to why they are not improving. I am keeping myself busy though so the urges only really get hard to cope with at the end of the day when the kids are in bed and i get to relax a little.

Suzanne has gymnastics club tonight so it's time i got some warm soup into the kids tummy's, and mine aswell. It is so cold today. Hope it's warmer where you are.

Love and peace

Michelle

The kids are off school this week leaving me very lttle time to myself. That's why i've not been here for a few days, well that and the fact that my PC finally gave up on me. I am a bit baffled as to what is wrong with it but i will keep trying.

With the kids off school i've not really been up to much. Desperately trying to keep the house in order...lol...and making sure the kids have enough to keep themselves amused. At the moment they are all upstairs making a mess....or playing as they call it.  Friday was the start of the holiday and we spent the day cleaning the bedrooms. We watched DVD'S, played with some of their games and listened to some music. Im afraid my influence on them has caused a major love of all things musical.  Saturday again saw me attemting to keep things tidy while the kids ran riot around the house. Martin worked all day on the PC hoping he could get it working again but to no avail. Sunday was my lazy day. I done no housework, besides the dishes, and just chilled out in front of the TV. The kids played in their rooms, played on the playstation and read their books. Im afriad thats another of my influences.  I can't remember a time when i didn't love reading and there is no better way to wind down at night than with a good book. I tend to read Stephen King, James Herbert or Dean Koontz but can read just about anything. Stephen King has always been a fav of mine though. I must have been around 11 or 12 when i read my first Stephen King novel, Carrie, and have been addicted ever since.  

Monday the kids and i took a trip to the doctors. Louise has some itchy patches of red skin on her arms and legs whick needed looking at. She has a form of eczema so we have some cream for her to use. I had to see about my scan resukts. I have been put on a contraceptive pill to reglate my monthy cycle and hopfully stop the ovulation pain i am currently getting. Being valentines day i got some beauitiful Red and Pink Roses from Martin along with a cute little cuddle pink teddy bear. aaaawwww

Today i have had my music blasting while doing the dusting and hoovering. The kids are keeping themselves busy upstairs so i can get on with it. I had some lovely bran scones earlier. I've not had one for ages and really had a liking for one. Things always taste so much better when you've not had it for a while i think. The rest of the day will be spent playing with the kids. Paul and Caitlin have been playing with the toy cars and dinosaurs and i think i might go and join in the fun.  Not only will it give me a break from the muntane tast of housework but it might just take my mind offf these urges too. They are still a little on the high side and my poor head is bleeding from all the scraches it now bears.

Hope you all had a great weekend and an even better week

Love and peace,

Michelle